Do You Feel Invisible?

Have you ever been involved in a conversation with someone and they seemed to be looking past you?  I know I do it to my wife more than I care to admit.

Yesterday, I was speaking at an event and I was greeting a few of the attendees and I asked one of the women in attendance, “How are you?” and she replied, “I feel invisible.”

I was inspired by the comment to ask the rest of the attendees if there was ever a time when they felt invisible.  Only one hand went up and it was the hand of the woman who had made the statement earlier.  I then said to her, “I SEE YOU! I see your potential and I see your value.” She was on the verge of tears.  Someone acknowledged her.  I then asked the rest of the attendees once again, “Do you ever feel invisible?”  This time, half the people in the room raised their hands!

Pointing around the room, I exclaimed, “I SEE YOU!”

In this life, we come in contact with so many different people.  Some of these individuals can make you feel small and insignificant.  Have you ever been in a job interview and the person interviewing you looked at you as if you were not in the room . . . like you were invisible?

Well, it is important that we align ourselves with people who see us as valuable human beings, people who don’t look past us.  How powerful it is to hear the phrase I SEE YOU!

One last thing:if no one else see you, you need to see yourself!

Have you chosen your life or has life chosen you?

I recently had the opportunity to hear world renowned author, Richard Bolles, who wrote what I think is the greatest book on job hunting, “What Color Is Your Parachute.” During his talk, Mr. Bolles said that we need to choose our life’s work.

In today’s economy many people are having to settle for whatever job they can find just to put food on the table.  My mother says, “You do what you have to do to take care of your family.”  Although that is true and sometimes necessary, it begs the question, how long will I allow myself to stay where I have to settle?  How long will I allow life to choose me instead of choosing the life I want.

You may ask, “How do I choose the life I want?”  Well, what are you good at?  What makes your heart sing?  Most of us do not take the time to assess what it is that would give us our greatest joy.

You must find a way to do what you are really good at and love to do.  This will give you the confidence you need to pursue your life’s work.

Don’t let life choose you, choose the life you want and pursue it with passion!

I Remember Momma

I remember, Momma, when you carried me in your arms.

I remember, Momma, when you washed and clothed me.

I remember, Momma, when you walked me to school.

I remember, Momma, how you fed me the best burgers in the world!

I remember, Momma, when you spanked me (I deserved them all).

I remember, Momma, how you cared for me when I was sick.

I remember, Momma, how you encouraged me.

I remember, Momma, how you sacrificed your happiness for mine.

I remember, Momma, when you prayed for me.

Most of all I remember, Momma, how you LOVED ME!

Momma, you will always be in my mind and in my heart.  You are a pearl of great price! 

God blessed me with the BEST!

Do you have any fond memories of your Momma?  

Afraid?

Afraid to love?

Afraid to laugh?

Afraid To live?

Why? A loveless mother? An abusive father? Maybe.

Abuse, fear, hate, and a lack of self worth are the building blocks of who you have become.

You are afraid to step out and love for fear of being hurt.

You are afraid to laugh for fear it may not last.

You are afraid to live, for fear of death.

None of the pain and hurt you feel has to define who you are. You have been designed by God with infinite potential. You do not have to live in defeat and fear.  God's Love is Enough!

No matter what you have gone through or are going through, you do not have to swim in a pool of despair and hopelessness.  God's Love is Enough!

There is an ocean of love and opportunity just waiting for you.  Dive in! Do not be afraid!  God's Love is Enough!

It Is Good!

Genesis 1:31 (NIV)God saw all that he had made, and it was very good...

Matthew 5:16 (NIV)
In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.

It is good to wake up to a brand new day full of opportunities to love and serve people.

It is good to be with  family and friends.

It is good to serve and love the people God has placed in our paths.

It is good to enjoy God's creation.

It is good to think on all of the blessings God has bestowed on us.

It is good to extend a hand in friendship with someone new.

It is good to Love in a Real and authentic way. 

It is good to experience the goodness of God.

It is good to forgive.

Ugly From The Inside Out!

"When we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we can turn the whole animal. Or take ships as an example. Although they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are steered by a very small rudder wherever the pilot wants to go. Likewise, the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole body, sets the whole course of one’s life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell."  James 3:3-6 NIV

Over 3 million people have been killed in the 21st century through sectarian violence, political and religious persecution. Man can be worse than any animal on earth. Animals typically kill to survive, not just to inflict pain.

Man continues to develop more effective ways to kill, hurt and cause pain to each other. I believe the careless word either written or spoken can be just as deadly. We now have a term known as "Cyber Bullying". That term did not exist 10 years ago.

People now can tweet or post on Facebook some of the ugliest and most hurtful things about people. It doesn't even matter if it's true or not. They now have a name for these people, they call them "trolls.” The ugliness of the character the name refers to is appropriate to the behavior.

My question is why?  Why are we so mean-spirited? Even our politicians call each other names like they are little kids.

We are in trouble as a people. The name calling and the violence does not seem to have an end in sight. What is it with this love affair with hatred, violence and name calling? Will it ever end?  As I write this post there is war in Egypt, Syria, Iraq, Afghanistan and other parts of the world. With the presidential elections on the horizon it promises to be the dirtiest campaign in history. And you know what?  Many are looking forward to it. You have heard and will continue to hear "negative ads work.” We love hearing the airing of the dirty laundry on our politicians. It extends to our actors and sports stars.

What to do? It starts with you. If you cannot say anything good, say nothing at all. Hmm . . .  where have I heard that before? 

You Never Know

My son recently started a new job with Starbucks Coffee and he came home and told us a story that still gives me pause. One morning a man came in to get a cup of coffee. The man really looked down and had a scowl on his face. When he came to the counter he ordered his coffee. The barista who took his order recognized the painful and troubled expression on his face and said with a smile, “You look like you could use a free cup of coffee.  Please accept it as a gift from me.”

The man took the coffee without saying a word and walked out of the store. About two hours later he returned and said to the barista, “I just got of prison and if it were not for your kindness I was going to hurt someone today.”  Wow! You never know...

You never know what someone is going through and the affect of your actions on the person. Do you smile or grimace at people you meet? Do you open the door for someone or let it slam in their face?

Some of you may have heard about the story of the student walking to school who dropped his books and as he was picking them up, another student bent down and helped him, while other students just walked by.

Years later, at the student's graduation in which he was valedictorian, he recounted the story and to everyone's surprise he said that on that day he had been on his way home to commit suicide. Because of the actions of the student who helped pick up his books he had changed his mind.

You never know...

Just like the perceptive and kind barista, we need to be aware of what is going on around us and to be sensitive to the lives of others.  Simple acts of kindness can have a big impact on someone's life and potentially change the course of history.

You never know...

You Are A Loser! (Not!)

You are a loser! Those four short little words, carelessly formed and uttered 21 years ago, had a significant impact in a man’s life.

After a brief talk I gave to a group last week, I was walking back to take a seat and this man stopped me and said,” I have to talk to you.” He shared with me that he had not known if he even wanted to be there that day until he heard me say three simple phrases:

You are valuable! You are significant! You have what it takes!

He said he had been feeling depressed, frustrated and worthless, but after hearing these phrases, something woke up in him that helped him overcome the silly, hurtful and stinging words hurled at him 21 years before, “You are a loser!”

Deep down inside he knew he was not a loser, but when things were not going well and he was stuck looking for the reasons why, little words and phrases especially, negative ones, just popped up and smacked him right in the face!

Have you ever had those words directed to you? If you have, they do not have to define who you are and what you can become. Whether you lose or win will be determined by your attitude. If you let the negativity of the words of others take root in your heart and soul, uncertainty and pain will grow.

Understanding your value and believing in who you were created to be can act as a shield to your heart and mind. As a result, no one will ever be able to rob you of who you are.

A positive attitude and your belief in yourself is a winning combination for overcoming any negative attacks aimed at bringing you down.